Things I once earnestly loved am now utterly embarrassed to admit*:

 

  • Quentin Tarantino’s greater works
  • Chuck Palahniuk’s greater works
  • Curly Sue
  • Flared jeans
  • Fruitopia
  • Beavis and Butthead
  • Watermelon and green apple flavored Jelly Bellys
  • The Doors (the band and film)
  • Bonsai trees from the mall
  • Twister, the movie and the game
  • Ceramic cat figurines
  • Who Framed Roger Rabbit
  • Hippie stores
  • CK One
  • Dunkin’ Donuts bagels
  • Piranhas
  • Granny Smith apples
  • Can You Feel The Love Tonight by Elton John
  • Jagermeister
  • Books about vampires
  • JJ & Jeff for TurboGrafx16
  • Monster energy drink
  • New Kids On The Block
  • Mike’s Hard Lemonade
  • Lip gloss; any kind
  • Pastel eye shadow
  • Self-infantalizing fashion (knee socks, babydoll dresses, mary jane shoes, jellies, pacifier necklaces, etc)
  • Clothing, decor or accessories feat. the following symbols:
    • yin yang; Asian characters; any other culturally-appropriating/Orientalist “trends” from the 90s
    • “alien face”
    • “smiley face”
    • “tongue sticky out face”
    • Sun, moon and stars
  • Okabashi sandals from the drug store
  • Owls or birds of any kind as a motif on clothing, furniture or accessories
  • Hunter green Chuck Taylors
  • Ellios frozen pizzas
  • T-shirts with any cartoon franchise on it (Looney Tunes, Winnie The Pooh, Peanuts, etc)
  • Glitter hair gel
  • Starter jackets
  • The Chronicles of Narnia
  • Rockabilly clothing; especially with flash tattoo imagery or hearts/skulls/cherries on it
  • Woody Allen movies
  • Acid-washed denim
  • Spencer’s Gifts
  • E.L. Doctorow
  • Gourmet popcorn
  • Loaded baked potato soup
  • Every single Nickelodeon branded toy
  • All-4-1
  • Co-Ed Naked shirts
  • Tie-die clothing
  • Forrest Gump (book and film)
  • International Coffee Vienna Flavored Instant Powder Drink
  • French vanilla “cappucino” from the machine at the gas station

*see also

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